


is a place you can't avoid

by slipshod



Category: Superstore (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, F/M, there's hardly any dialogue in this and i feel weird and bad about it, they don't end up together
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-30
Updated: 2017-09-30
Packaged: 2019-01-07 08:34:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,987
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12229320
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/slipshod/pseuds/slipshod
Summary: *talking close to the mic, low and slow like a sultry late night smooth jazz DJ* Magisterequitum, girl, you requested a pairing where one of the characters is married and then you put “infidelity” in your DNW list. You got my head spinning. This one goes out to you.This is an AU where you form an emotional bond with your soulmate when you touch them. I imagine this all taking place in the same time-frame as the first season, although it doesn't follow along with canon.





	is a place you can't avoid

**Author's Note:**

  * For [magisterequitum](https://archiveofourown.org/users/magisterequitum/gifts).



> *talking close to the mic, low and slow like a sultry late night smooth jazz DJ* Magisterequitum, girl, you requested a pairing where one of the characters is married and then you put “infidelity” in your DNW list. You got my head spinning. This one goes out to you. 
> 
> This is an AU where you form an emotional bond with your soulmate when you touch them. I imagine this all taking place in the same time-frame as the first season, although it doesn't follow along with canon.

Jonah’s in love, and he hates it.

 

It starts out horribly, and that’s before things get really bad.

 

He goes to help her pick up the fallen 6-packs of toilet paper. She’s cute and he is, of course, a condescending ass. She eggs him on in a way that is arguably--in hindsight, perhaps--magnificent, but in effect just makes him feel panicked and awful, and what’s worse is that he knows he deserves it. She starts to leave before he can get his foot out of his mouth, and in his mortification he reaches out to her.

 

That would be bad enough, even if nothing happened: soulmates are rare, but you still don’t just touch someone without their consent, just in case. But something does happen. She’s already recoiling, jerking her arm away, before the feeling settles over him. A pleasantness in his heart, a feeling of being home, what he would swear feels like a literal spark in his fingertips where he touched her.

 

She can feel it, too, he can tell. Not everyone does, sometimes it only goes one way, but he can see it in the way her eyes light up warmly and they just connect for a moment before her face turns dark. She scoffs.

 

“Awesome,” she deadpans, and then walks away.

 

* * *

 

He finds out later that it’s not about him, not really. Well, not entirely, anyway.

 

They’re at a table in the breakroom. She had taken pity on him after about 18 minutes of him lying despondently in the ruins of the toilet paper tower. He was feeling sorry for himself and hadn’t quite got his game face back on when he felt the tingle of her presence, and sure enough, there she was in his periphery with two cups of coffee. She jerked her head toward the back of the store, so naturally he got up to follow her.

 

He’s noticed more about her in this interaction, but he tells himself he’s cool about it. She’s got a sense of humor that’s like a sharp blade, now that he knows to look for it, but she’s also got a kind smile that seems to be stuck to her face. She’s got shiny hair and soft-looking lips. She makes him feel complete when she’s with him. He can’t imagine living without her from this point forward. It’s all mundane observations like this. He just notices a bunch of perfectly normal stuff about her, and that’s all, and he’s not going to be weird about it.

 

She talks about herself a little bit, where she grew up, how she came to work here and what her position is. She recaps what she gleaned from Dina about him. He just listens. He feels like he could zone out and get lost in the lilt of her voice, but unfortunately he hears every word she says.

 

“Anyway, we might as well have it out here. I guess you feel this connection too.” His heart speeds up, stupidly. He nods his head. “Yeah. I’m sorry, but this is going to have to be one of those platonic soulmates things, because I already have someone.”

 

“You have...?” He can work with this. He just needs some more information.

 

“A husband,” she supplies. It’s not ideal, but still. Maybe she’ll warm up to him. He nods again in what he believes gives off a cool but serious vibe.

 

“Heh, you know earlier, for a minute there I thought maybe you had walked off because I--admittedly--was in rare bad form earlier.” Ugh, why is he talking like this? “I mean I acted like a dick. Actually if you--”

 

“And we have a daughter.”

 

“That’s great,” he responds nonchalantly before he lets himself process it. He tamps down the impulse to say he loves kids, what’s her name, can he meet her, maybe he and Amy can take her out for a picnic or something. She’s married and she’s going to try to make it work with him. Because she has a daughter. With her husband. So there’s that. Like, that’s nice, so he doesn’t know why she sounded like she was apologizing to him.

 

And honestly, this is a really common scenario. Soulmates are rare, so it’s foolish not to live your life for hope that you might find them. People tend not to do it, which is for the best, he thinks. He wonders fleetingly if the floor is dropping out from under him, but he shuffles his feet and there it is, so he moves on, because he’s chill, he gets it.

 

“I get it, you know?” he says to her. He can tell he’s about to start rambling but he’s pretty sure he can keep it on track. “Who could blame you, after all. I wouldn’t wait around for my soulmate either. I mean, I didn’t. I wasn’t! Actually when I saw you, I thought you were cute.” This doesn’t sound chill so he has to backtrack. “I mean--No. I just mean, I was hitting on you when we first met, so, that just goes to show. Because that was before. You know.” He gestures vaguely between them and ends up with his hand pointing at his own heart, and when he sees it he kind of feels like crying.

 

Then he stands up and leaves without saying anything else, because he doesn’t want to make it weird, that’s all. But he’s fine. He’s easy like Sunday morning.

 

* * *

 

As Jonah will tell anyone, given really any opening to do so, he’s proud to work alongside Amy, because she is a strong, independent woman and Jonah has the utmost respect for her decisions.

 

* * *

 

“So...Amy’s your soulmate,” Garrett says casually, mid-conversation, as Jonah leans on the counter. “That sucks.”

 

“Wha--Did she tell you? Why?”

 

“She told me so I wouldn’t be mean to you. Those are her words. I’m not mean.” Garrett smiles at him guilelessly. Jonah’s sure it was meant to make him feel uncomfortable, and it definitely hits its mark.

 

“I meant why does it suck. Actually, according to the 2010 census, only 4% of the population connects to their soulmates. So, it’s uncommon, yeah, and it’s actually pretty cool, like I can tell when she’s getting annoyed, or hungry, or--”

 

Garrett rolls his eyes and holds up a finger. “One, I should have known you’d be a hipster even about this.”

 

Jonah automatically replies that he’s not a hipster but Garrett raises a second finger and talks right over him.

 

“And two, anyone can tell when Amy’s annoyed because her eyes look crazy. Watching her with a difficult customer is like watching a supervillain origin story.”

 

Jonah snorts fondly. Garrett raises his eyebrows at him and leans forward.

 

“Listen dude, Amy is stubborn. Like, really seriously stubborn. Especially when it comes to people she cares about. So, just. You should know that going in. Not like her marriage is that great but she's been digging in even harder since you showed up.”

 

Jonah wants to ask more about her marriage, like, really badly. “What are you talking about? I don't want to break up her marriage, that's. Insane.”

 

“It’s cool, I'm on your side. Her husband is even lamer than you are. But like I said, she's not the type to give up on things when she thinks it's important.”

 

“Yeah, she's loyal.” Jonah clears his throat. “That's not--I mean I'm good with how things are, anyway.” He lifts his head up and his eyes scan around for her.

 

“You want her so bad.”

 

Jonah manages to huff out a laugh and shrugs cavalierly.

 

* * *

 

Being rejected by your soulmate is not a highly-publicized feature of the whole business. It happens like this a lot. Soulmates are the stuff of fairytales and romcoms, and most people grow up, and, like Amy, have lives they can’t just throw by the wayside. Everyone knows it sucks, and there’s no point in lingering on it. Although Jonah did study a few cutting experimental films on the topic. He thought they said a lot about society, but actually they were a little sensationalistic, in retrospect. They didn’t have much to offer in the way of guidance for someone who’s experiencing it.

 

What is definitely highly-publicized about soulmates is the emotion sharing, although in Jonah’s opinion, it’s just as bad. Sure, it always seems cute in movies when there’s an unattached and carefree Kate Hudson-type discovering love. It’s really less cute and more embarrassing when, for instance, your soulmate’s head swivels towards you accusingly while she’s leading a team meeting because she got extra bossy for a minute and maybe you found it a little arousing. And it’s definitely not cute when every time you’re alone with your soulmate all you feel coming through from their end of the connection is awkwardness and regret.

 

Amy avoids being alone with him.

 

* * *

 

Jonah does meet Amy’s daughter, when Amy brings her to the store out of necessity one day, and of course Jonah agrees to help. It’s awkward at first, and then even more awkward, but they bond. It turns out they get along well.

 

He always imagined himself with kids of his own someday, a bunch of mini-Jonahs, if he’s being honest with himself. He’d want to raise them to be educated and socially aware and to appreciate the finer things in life, like The Knife and single origin coffee. But Amy isn’t parenting that way, isn’t raising a mini-Amy. She’s provided her with a moral framework but she’s raising an individual, an independent thinker.

 

In the abstract, Emma was something like an obstacle for Jonah. Not an obstacle in the sense that he needed to get it out of the way, but like a puzzle that he would need to solve if he wanted Amy. And he hasn’t let himself think concretely about what he does want from Amy, but he did knew to have her in his life in any capacity, winning Emma over would be an important step.

 

When Emma shows up, the pressure is high and he has no game-plan. He doesn’t know what kids like, he doesn’t know how to find common ground or make her like him. But the day plays out, and things just sort of happen by themselves, almost like it was meant to be.

 

* * *

 

“...but I’m not convinced it will ultimately end the power struggle in South Sudan,” he finishes his rant and looks up at Amy, who’s standing over him holding the “wet floor” floor sign over her head cutely, watching him sweep the shattered remains of a snow globe into a dustpan.

 

Surprisingly, Amy seems more amused than anything else.

 

“What?” he asks. “You don’t agree?”

 

She ignores the question. “Doesn’t acting cool around me feel weird?” He’s thrown.

 

“No, I--I really am this cool,” he tells her earnestly.

 

She laughs at him, cutting right through him. While he’s watching her laugh, all thoughts that aren’t _her_ leave his head. He doesn’t even remember to be offended.

 

She coughs suddenly and avoids looking him in the eye for two days.

 

* * *

 

For the most part, they get along well. Because of course they do; they’re soulmates.

 

They banter good-naturedly. It’s healthy, part of a good working relationship, although he knows it probably looks like flirting, and in a way it does scratch that itch in his heart.

 

Sometimes they get competitive with each other. Sometimes they team up and get competitive with others. They motivate each other in weird ways without even discussing it. They get to know each other, just the way you do when you spend a few dozen hours a week around someone.

 

Amy is nice to a fault, but she’s bitter, and Jonah can relate to that. Their shared sense of humor lies largely in the snarky gibe area, and their workplace is fertile ground to plant those seeds. They pass time together at Garrett’s desk and he unknowingly chaperones their interactions.

 

And when Jonah’s shift ends, he goes back to his apartment, and listens to his record player or watches a documentary, and his soul is perplexed, bereft of its other half.

 

* * *

 

Pining away quietly over Amy becomes part of his routine, part of his workday. It goes past wistful yearning and into dark self doubt. He’s tired from missing her all the time, deep down. He’s lost, too, not sure if he has any chance to hope for a world where he doesn’t miss her. He wonders if he should talk about it with Amy, or maybe Garrett. Garrett _is_ mean, but he’d probably listen.

 

Amy picks up on it and spends about a week casting furtive looks in his direction, and unfortunately he catches all of these looks because he’s always watching her like a creepy stalker.

 

One of the times they make eye contact, she starts walking over to him, and he folds over a kitchen display to cradle his head in his arms.

 

“Why are you so sad all the time?” she asks his prone form.

 

“I’m just not feeling well,” he says into his arms. “I’m sick.”

 

“Nope.” Her impatience rattles into him through their connection and he feels himself picking it up.

 

He stands. “I’ve been wondering if you liked me more, if you would choose me.” It hurts to admit it, because he knows it’s stupid and immature, but it doesn’t matter because Amy pays no heed to the emotion in his confession, just bulldozes straight past it, no-nonsense.

 

“Is that why you’re always acting weird around me?”

 

He sighs. “I get it, you think I’m fake. Unfortunately, I have to assure you that that’s how I act around everyone.”

 

“Yeah, I know, but why around _me_? Jonah, I can see through you, remember? So why bother?”

 

He wants to tell her that she’s right, he’s been putting up a front this whole time, for years even. That he has an idea of what he should enjoy, what he should think, what he should talk about, and so that’s what he does. That he wants to break out of that for her and find out, together, who he really is underneath.

 

“Why would I act differently around you? What do we have that’s special?” he says instead, because he’s hurting and he’s insecure, and somehow he doesn’t feel any worse when she doesn’t have an answer.

 

* * *

 

“Hey.” He approaches her on the loading dock the next day while she’s reading a magazine. He feels her discomfort as he sits down next to her, which smarts a little, but the way out is through, as they say. “I don’t mean to interrupt but I just wanted to tell you that I’m sorry.”

 

“I know you are,” she replies, referring to their connection. She shrugs amiably and he feels a little better already.

 

“I don’t want you to think that I think you owe me anything, or that I’m trying to win you, or anything like that. That’s probably what I made it sound like, and I don’t want to be one of those guys. It’s just my soul aching and making me feel stupid ways.” He waves his hand around dismissively to give himself a chance to swallow. “But just so you know, I know I can’t do like a magic spell to make you decide to be with me. You’re an autonomous individual and I respect your decisions.” She smiles at this, probably because she’s heard him say it so many times, but he doesn’t mind. “I actually--I mean. Sort of. I appreciate that you’re devoted to your family. It’s an admirable quality. Even if...” he trails off. “Well, you know how I feel about you. So, yeah, that’s it.”

 

She’s been watching him the whole time he’s been speaking, and now she leans back on her hands. They just stare at each other for about 20 seconds.

 

“It’s hard for me too,” she says at last. Jonah’s not sure what part she’s referring to. “At the end of a shift, my instinct is to go home and be with my daughter, but it’s kinda like part of me is always wondering where you are.”

 

That’s exactly how Jonah feels, he wants to tell her, but she probably gets it, so he just digests this new information.

 

“And,” she continues, “I like you, Jonah. I like spending time with you. It’s not just the soulmates thing.”

 

Jonah takes a deep breath and focuses on keeping his expression neutral while his insides feel like they’re filling with helium. He can tell she knows, anyway, because her eyes widen like she just set something on fire by accident, but he can tell she’s not really distressed.

 

“Me too,” he says breezily, and looks off to the treeline at the side of the parking lot. He bites his lip to keep himself from elaborating, because if he turns on that faucet he might not be able to turn it back off. “I’m glad that I found you,” he says simply, which they both know is no small thing given the way he’s been feeling the past few weeks. He wants to say he’ll always be happy to be in her life no matter what their relationship is, but he thinks it might ring hollow.

 

“Do you want to go to a movie this afternoon?” she asks out of the blue. They both get off at 1, so she’ll have time before Emma finishes school.

 

“Definitely,” he replies. He thinks that normally she would probably spend that time doing things for her family, so this is truly a branch of friendship. A new page in the book of them, whatever lies ahead. “Do you know that arthouse theater behind the bakery on R Street? They're showing a series of--”

 

“Oh my god, never mind!” she shouts, laughing, lying back on the dock. He laughs too. 

**Author's Note:**

> Soooo I set out to write a cute little soulmates AU, I had a nice little non-angsty outline and everything, and then as I was writing it I realized that Jonah is too passionate and neurotic, and if there were any more pressure on him he would crack a little. So it got dark and then they didn't end up together. It's not my fault.


End file.
